UNDER PRESSURE

I’ve decided to turn over a new leaf: NO MORE RUSHING!

I have a bad habit of rushing, as though there is some internal pressure to go, go, go – faster, faster, faster. The end result of this type of thinking is a lot of heart stress, a sense of panic that I’m not doing enough in the time allotted, and, if there are others that are causing me delay, impatience and rudeness. Why do I live this way?

Some background: Much of the internal language we tell ourselves is reflected in the way we approach life. I find myself say to others, “I’ll be back in a second,” or “I’m going to just pop over here and grab that, I’ll be right back,” and off I go, scurrying around like a squirrel. In fact, when I describe my personality, I often use the term squirrely, in jest, of course, but not really.

Some history: Isn’t it a child’s inclination is to dawdle, do things in their own time, explore the environment as they go about a task? It’s all part of learning, and that is great, unless you’re a parent who needs to get something done. Or, maybe you’ve sent that child to get something from another part of the house that you’d like to see, say, this century . . . . I grew up hearing, “Run upstairs, quick like a bunny rabbit.” Okay, it wasn’t the “roust, roust, roust” of Hogan’s heros, but it had the motivating effect of getting me moving. As my colleague  learned Spanish, I heard, “vamos, chica!” Go, go, go

Today: Pile on top of that mental expectations to be quick-witted, the smartest, fastest, most on top of situation, go to person. In school, it became the important for me to be the person who answered first, not necessarily correctly. At home, “What do you want to eat? where do you want to go? Where are my keys?”, no time for ruminating, I feel like I should have been thinking about these things already and have the answer immediately. The worst thing to be is slow, dim-witted, a dullard.

What is the result of all this rushing? Inefficient use of time and impatience. irritability and unsafe decisions. Panic and heart stress. Regret and fear. I started taking CoQ10 to bolster my energy levels. CoQ10 has benefit of nourishing the mitochondria of the cells, solving all kinds of problems from fatigue, to joint pain, to metabolism. I mean think about, if you give the power house of your cells a boost, it improves almost everything in the body, right? I believe it helps reduce chronic inflammation, as well. According to the bottle, it also helps with heart health. So is it any wonder that after taking CoQ10 for 2 weeks that my heart would send me a message – “stop rushing me!”

So, I’ve turned over a new leaf: No more rushing. Like any habit, it takes patience and practice to break, and truly change behavior. My expectations with regard to changing this behavior may not be reflected externally. I may not be more efficient managing my time at my job, but I may make fewer mistakes and not take my work home. I’ll still walk fast because I have a long stride length, and, if I’m not feeling fatigued, walking is great exercise. I may not be any smarter, either, but I know when I’m relaxed, my brain recalls information more readily – wow! the information really IS in there somewhere. All this could also make me nicer, or at least more pleasant to be around. I may actually become more like the person that I want to be.

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